Post - Interview

After reflecting and talking to my bro in law, I realized why it bothered me so much after “failing” that interview. How I lost my cool. I realized that everything was done deliberately to test my patience and my reaction to stress. 

I failed. Something came out that was filled with arrogance, impatience, and vile, which I don’t believe I would even do, but alas it came out.  I was found out for what really hid behind the image. I am glad it came out, and be realized for what it is. Its like this dunya, Allah has his way to expose the person no matter how much he tries to hide himself (not coz he’s feeling guilty, thats a different story), I’m talking about someone who thinks highly of themselves, that he is beyond tests. Allah brings them down to remind him who is control. I have to admit, I got a taste of whats it like in the corporate world, and frankly I want in. I see the end result is a systematic, thick skinned individual who is set on accomplishing goals no matter what. I visualize a person who is unfazed by external emotions and is able to contain himself in extremely stressful situations. The corporate world is life. A life with two children who need direction. A wife who needs a leader. A family who needs a backbone. If you can conquer that which I know is taller than the mountains of Moria, but hey its a journey. Its a recipe for role models and people of ihsan. The problem for so many people they forgot to infuse this process with Islam. They forget to rely. They forget to cry. Its the school of hard knox. But hey I want in. The smell of excellence is too enticing not to indulge. The stress and how to handle it makes playdoh into bricks, and I think its about time I start building a house. 

Reflection: Connection Lost!

TV, WhatsApp, Instagram, Vine, Snapchat, Bollywood, Lollywood, Crazywood, all of it are constantly chipping away priceless moments to witness. Its like you carrying a DSLR walking through mountains and beautiful landscape but unable to snap a single shot because all you see is nothing. As much as these things are crucial to being connected in the world, we often forget to connect with ourselves. The more we involve ourselves with external pleasure, we forget to address the inner pain. Wait! this is confusing! How can you say that I am feeling pain when Im watching a cool movie, or talking to my friends. I feel good and laugh more. My argument is that when you do not face your pain, you lose touch with yourself. With every instance of exposure to this worldly life, our soul feels pain. Every sinful act we do, our soul feels pain. Every over indulgence we go through, our soul feels pain. However, this pain is relieved through awareness of its Healer.  


The similitude of such is when you come home and see your loved one in tears, the whimpering kind. Your first instinct is to drop everything and speak and comfort the person so they can smile to see the next day. 

Our soul yearns for the hereafter, it feels lonely in this earth. Therefore it thrives on memories of the promised land through reflection and reminder. Its like reminicising with a guy who is from Madinah but lives in Karachi on the good "life" (same thing like talking to a guy who lives in Toronto but he is from Vancouver, no contest) lol.  Our soul is similar in that, it smiles when reminded of the good after "life", and cries when its deprived. By depriving the soul from this reflection, you deny its access to beauty, and force it to settle to the misery of the temporal world.  Our feelings of guilt, hope, and fear then start to wash away. Its result = a hard heart, a soul that hates to love, a blind eye, a deaf ear, a confused mind, and a sour life. 

This is the unspoken life that we often fail to speak about.

Go back to the roots

The overcomplication of concepts, the complexity of our own image, the deeper essence of our strengths and weaknesses, our whole perception of what life is and should give us can often blind us on the real picture. The plethora of perspectives can sometimes be detrimental as it becomes an addictive stimulant your brain holds on to. The brain tends to create these stories and "depth" in order to increase its own perception of worth. A brain that often philosophise prides itself in expressing deep knowledge breeding arrogance which then distances itself from the heart.  These often end with internal conflicts that can result in external death.

The beauty of life though is in its utter simplicity. The sweetness of the break of dawn and the descend of the night are there for a reason. They ground you. They lay their priorities and roles down so you can humble down. The farmers whose eyes wake up to the rays of the sun automatically inherits it's beauty and sweetness which internally transforms into content and trust.

It is when we transgress these things that we become affected. Yes it is highly praiseworthy to get up in the middle of your night to plead to the Creator, but it comes after a series of routine of your own eyes witnessing the beauty of dawn celebrating it with praises to the Highest of High.

What I am saying in this blog is appreciate the simple beauty, complications result when simple is taken for granted. When your soul becomes used to the morning beauty of fajr, dhikr, and Quran from the get go, The Most Merciful places a power in your heart that not only out do but also nourishes the brain to sync with His Plans therefore smile with the beauty of trust and love.

May Allah bless us with routine for His sake and guide us to pray always to Him for all things. Ameen

My fight against the cloud

This is the first time I'm blogging in a while but thought it would be a good way to start my own personal battle with the cloud.

What is the cloud?
The cloud is a brewing combination of delusions, confusions and all the negative sions attached to it. It is the thing that brings me down in all aspects preventing me from reaching the potential that my eyes swell up for.  It's a series of distractions with every intent in spreading my wings so thin that I can't see it anymore. It's a feeling of darkness that pulls me back to my bed when I need to wake up to pray. It's the long list of excuses to why I can't do an action this particular time. As a result it brews confusion and self doubt. It limits me to be a bystander of success rather than the initiator. It also promotes blame convincing me that the barriers are often set up by obligated social standards.

Here I am telling you that no matter what I sill be at war with this cloud. I know myself that inshaAllah I will get through this and indeed find my potential.  I have to take account of myself and look for ways to maximize yourself away from the cloud. It is to see things as they are in comparison to how valuable it is to you. It is time to take a deep breath and look at what's important to you. Look at the smiles and cries of your wife and kids. You need to sky beyond that to give them the best they can have. But most important of them all. Have trust in your Creator. Allah has done so much for me while I've been slacking off. It's about time where I pull myself back together and fly again. May Allah make it easy. Ameen.

Ignorance brings about more Ignorance

The world has yet again witnessed another onslaught of Muslims going absolutely nuts over a very amateur looking video, directed by a meth addict with an aim to defame the Muslims. Well here's some good news, he didn't disgrace us, we did it ourselves.

First off... No one knew about this video until the Muslims showed the world by attacking American embassies in Libya and Egypt. They got people curious and initiated a world wide click fest on the YouTube world. On top of that, they took a life of an ambassador in Libya who's only crime was that he shared the video's nationality.

But oh that didn't stop them, people in Sudan decided to go after both the British and the German embassies as well.

I feel sorry for those people who think this is completely justifiable. This in fact is the stupidest way to represent the Best of Creation. I plead to you people of sanity. Do you think our noble Prophet (peace be upon him) or his companions would run onto the streets and publicly act like imbeciles destroying anything they see.

Of course not, if we Muslims remember the seerah or the biography of the Beloved of God upon whom be endless peace and tranquility till the end of time, we might encounter numerous stories where he was insulted in public day in and day out and he still came out smiling. It never stopped his mission. But that's not all, he still maintained his composure and even upped it to wow people by his character and good works. Can we Muslims claim that? No of course not, who needs a smiling Muslim when you can just go to the flag seller, pay 4 rupees/dinars and grab your self a Made In China USA flag to burn and jump over? You sure get high when you're in a group of people who sanctions vandalism as long as its done in the love of the Prophet (peace be upon him). Its easier than focusing in prayer not thinking about where you kept your car keys.

What I am trying to say, is that we Muslims must be the bigger person and treat this as an isolated case which it is. We need to look within ourselves and give the world a reason to love our Prophet (peace be upon him). There is no way we can claim the beautiful nature of the Prophet (may Gods peace be upon him) by doing something very ugly by any human standards.  Protesting against something that has existed throughout time will never change anything. God said in the Quran ".. “Verily, God will not change the condition of a people as long as they do not change their state themselves."

This is a time of reflection for us all. What are we really doing for the sake of the religion? Have we showed our brothers and sisters in humanity the beauty that Islam gave us, or are we regurgitating the same rubbish that the media fed them with continuous anger and blame.

 Insulting the Prophet (peace be upon him) hurts but what really burns is when the people who claim to love him end up shaming him the most.

Will you stop expecting already???

Expectations and expectations! The dogs will continue to bark on and on. Causing lots of ruckus within us. The ongoing comparisons, the high hopes, the need to fit in. All these are just ingredients to produce an unstable internal environment. Today the lesson was learned very hard and very deep. Sometimes because of our insatiable need for social success, we base our own happiness in the approval of the society that governs us. This in turn causes many to turn a blind eye on what really is the very nature of our being. Human beings thrive on the fact that we are unique. We are unique from the animal kingdom and also unique from the spiritual beings that surround us. Each of us is equipped with a different genotype, phenotype, and think tank. Our ability to look at the world from different perspectives really add to the richness of our being. The problem is that we really don’t see it.

One of the biggest steps to understand this is to realize how special you are. There is no person on the face of the earth who lacks weaknesses and strengths. Everyone is equipped with both tendencies. However they manifest in different ways. The beauty of our religion is that it encompasses all that into an understanding that everything can be classified as worship as long as the intention is for Allah. (God). The paths to paradise (providing they believe in the ultimate Oneness of God and acknowledge that His last Messenger is Muhammad (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) are vast. It can range from perfecting the simplest of actions to gaining a state of high knowledge, from just consistently praying your obligatory prayers to the influx of voluntary actions. They all by the Mercy of God can bring you to paradise. For you to truly realize the gift of Allah to you is for you to first realize the bounties that have been given to you. By appreciating the innate beauty and strengths that you have within yourself, you will find yourself more thankful to God. The more you become pleased with yourself, the easier it is to accept God’s fate upon you. People like myself often misunderstood the idea of success. They subconsciously define success as the epitome of social acceptance. What people approve is usually the gauge that we use to determine how successful we are. Anything less will be harshly stigmatized. This is the nature of civilizations. By understanding your own uniqueness, you will also appreciate the uniqueness of others.

The word “expectations” whether vocalized or implied can really impact another persons life. The degree of impact really depends on the persons capability to handle it or if the expectations matches his or her strengths. Then the impact will be something that can be tolerable. These people become the subject of comparison to the ‘unfortunate’ others whose strengths do not match theirs. They inadvertently become the centre of envy which becomes an obstacle to ones self appreciation and realization. This is not to say that they are at fault. The only people at fault here are the ones who use them as tools to embody the meaning of success.

The notion of happiness is one that is highly sought after and sometimes its pursuit can leave the person more depressed than he started. What we fail to realize is that we can cause people to exchange their source of happiness for a couple pills of depression. We do that on a constant basis by destroying their uniqueness by telling them they are just not good enough. It shifts their focus on themselves to your words which you perceive as motivational, necessary can ultimately hurt, traumatize and impede their own self growth by putting a huge boulder on their self esteem. The colour combination of perspectives, understandings, and capabilities are in itself proofs to our existence and to our religion. When you look at the Prophets (peace be upon him)’s life, he dealt with people according to their strengths and would make suggestions to lift the boulder that he saw was impeding their growth. The suggestions varied from one to the other. He celebrated their success uniquely and he measured it according to a divine plan. Not a limited worldly one which is often interpreted as a one way, single lane road. The root of true happiness is the yearning of eternal happiness. The ability to understand your purpose and how you can embody it into your sense of self and every person are different. Not all people can be scholars, merchants, doctors, etc. Some wont even see the same reasons you see. However at its essence lies the most basic belief that there is only One God. This is the nature of the human being. Your sense of uniqueness and special self can help you further facilitate your closeness to Him. This is why there is an array of good deeds that one can do to attain that station with His Lord. Some are easier to do for some than others. It just depends on your tendencies and your makeup of your strengths and weakness. So this is a call for people like myself to appreciate the uniqueness of a person through their eyes, as opposed to my own perception of it. Getting a good job, getting married aren’t really the ingredients of success, for success lies in the understanding of oneself which leads into contentment of their role which can result in the happiness of self fulfillment towards the Divine Plan. The happiness that your soul yearns for over, and over again.

Why are you crying soul! What do you want!

When we think about the soul, we realize that it only needs Allah. A small sheer reminder of the divine instigates a ripple effect into the heart. Which leads to a more dynamic and live soul. The verse in the Quran which talks about it is

"Truly in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest”

In the remembrance of Allah, love is built and then manifested into contentment which is the crucial element to unwrap the gift of happiness.

A highly anticipated gift that hardly gets opened.